what is

it is imagining stepping back, into your body. from where ever it was you were just floating inside of your mind outside of your life. the act of asking one to imagine doing this is in and of itself a floating away so instead of imagining, just return. something about these practices is that if you have not been experiencing them by doing them someone telling you to do them can seem so abstract, but after the perceptual shift of understanding has been made through practice, it is difficult to explain them another way other than the very way that it was explained to you before you understood. i want to start to try to speak not metaphorically but actually to the experience of energy and energetic engagement.

recognizing that inside of your minds eye you can go somewhere completely else and what a gift to travel somewhere that has not been but could be or may be already is that you could meet some day if you find your way there. but if you are unable to come back to where you stand and look around for the direction to move towards that place from your reality it will remain a mind movement only. 

so i will be running and the energy can get my inner dialogue going and i realize that my energy is not all being given to moving my body so i am moving slower, holding myself limper and thus more at the behest of gravity and who wants more gravity when they are running. running is an act of lightness. accessing a wind inside of yourself. 

there will be a cloud of energy around me of all my thoughts and words unspoken and replaying scenarios and i can feel lines tugging on my limbs and the shape of myself as a body becoming an image of bad reception on the television. fuzzy zigzag lines pulled across and sideways, losing form. which is fine in some ways but makes running less ease, i keep getting snagged on time and space i am passing, pulling in one direction with energetic tethers in all others. like that is it, you can lose your own energy to being somewhere else inside your mind. that is the thing.

and why reject the life in front of you, which is the only thing that is yours alone, the full scope and perspective. we fear so much others ways and push against how they would seek to define us, feel in reaction and response to us and jump great chasms of logic or communication or knowing to come to comfortable conclusions about what they think, about you about the world about themselves. 

what you want and who you are is difficult to find out if you are trying to gauge every reaction before any action. probably impossible though some situations are so predictable you may find yourself right. and then that itself may be an indicator of pattern where growth and opening and unveiling of new perception is possible and likely but being untapped so you keep seeing the same outcome where there could be a new one and you keep getting the same outcome because you played the horse with blinders on. lest you get distracted from a problem lest you forget that you have a problem. 

what if in the course of forgetting the problem the problem blew away and months later you noticed its absence and could be dazzled at the self solving nature of being and life and happening.